Rail Kanya....

Rail Kanya.... 

It was five in the morning when I left home to catch my train to Bhusawal. A cold breeze accompanied the darkness as the sun was yet to rise in the little winter of Mumbai. I would be travelling by train after almost thirteen years . Covid has been a dampener with almost no travel in the last eight months. My mind was filled with fears of travel but my heart was pounding wildly over the thought of traveling by train after so long and I could barely contain my excitement. There was no traffic in the wee hours of the morning so we reached the Chatrapati Shivaji Terminus very quickly. 

There is something different about railway stations, the entrance with porters to help carry luggage,  the hustle and bustle, the announcements, the platforms, the vendors, the trains and of course a peculiar smell around everything. The only thing which seemed to have changed were the electric golf carts which made acccess to the platforms breezy for just forty rupees. 

I chose to walk and the walk to the platform from which my train would depart was quite long. As I trotted along with my suitcase in a carefree manner my eyes absorbed the old world charm of the Chatrapati Shivaji Terminus in all its stateliness. Yet I could not prevent my mind from wandering to the shoot out in 2008, the trauma it must have caused so many.

Soon my mind was diverted by the calls of the familiar, "Chai garam Chai" from the tea vendor. I started walking towards my compartment hurriedly. I could not resist  taking a few selfies just before entering it  with child-like glee.  

Once into the compartment,  I settled into the familiar Air-conditioned two tier coach. My mind was flooded with memories of countless travels in trains since childhood. 

Being born to an engineer in the railways, I always feel proud of being a rail kanya. Till I was a teenager, the railways and the  railway colony was the only world I knew. 

There are several perks of being in the railways. These included staying in well-maintained bungalows with manicured lawns and gardens, having excellent facilities with sports , orderlies to take care of your home. However what I liked most were the free passes we would get for travel which made travel so easy and such great fun. 

There was a romance in traveling by first class specially in a coupe. The typical smell in the compartment, the tea in white porcelain kettle and cups , the cutlet bread breakfast. 

When we traveled long distance the food carried in tiffin carriers along with a mattress in a holdall and a stainless steel kujaa for water made me feel important. Every journey was a new lesson in management. 

Train journeys are so cosmopolitan in nature as we create a small world during this journey with conversations with co-passengers, sharing of food. We are above caste, creed or colour for a short while.

  A friend of mind once mentioned that travelling in train is akin to maintaining "Drishtaa Bhaav" aligned yet aloof. While conversations got us close we yet maintained a distance ensuring of remaining untangled as if carrying joy and sadness together going about our own ways once our journey is over. 

We are also in proximity to nature and connected to earth as we watch different landscapes passing by. 

Among all my journeys I fondly remember those to Delhi when we could buy Kulhad ki chai and sip tea along with the earthy aroma. Our family trips to Chennai used to be eventful with changing trains at Wardha East Station where we often had to struggle for getting seats as we stayed in Bhusawal and getting inter state reservations was not possible those days.  

Railways have been the arteries,  veins and capillaries of travel as they connect different cities with their huge network. There is something unique about railways and an earthiness about a  train which binds you and holds you on. Perhaps ĺit is  the crisscross lines teaching us that all intersections ultimately become parallell leading us to our destination. 

There is so much behind this service , a number of departments,  a huge system working for its efficient functioning.

I was travelling by train almost after thirteen years and the nostalgia of every single thing made me emotional. There are so many little stories and memories of every travel. More about that some other day.....

Vaikuntha Ekadashi : Opening doors to positivity and good health....

Vaikuntha Ekadashi : Opening doors to positivity  and good health 

Ever since I was a child I have heard stories of heaven and hell. Heaven like a beautiful garden and hell with vessels of boiling oil on hot furnaces. However unpleasant death may sound the idea of going to heaven is always pleasing. Vaishnava Sampradayam literally opens the door of "Vaikuntham" for all Vaishnavas on "Vaikuntha Ekadashi".
Ekadashi is the eleventh day of the lunar month and so there are two Ekadashis in every solar month.
Vaikuntha Ekadashi is considered to be the mother of all Ekadashis and is also known as Mokshada Ekadashi. The fact that it comes in the Hindu month of Margashish makes it more special.  Lord Krishna also loved this month for he is believed to have said that among months I am Margashish. It is also believed to be the day on which Lord Krishna chanted the Bhagwat Gita to Arjun. So this day is also celebrated as Gita Jayanti.
In an age where each one of us is in search of inner peace , occassions like these offer us an opportunity to introspect and practice self control. 
Fasting is a practice which tests our capacity to resist temptations and our  strength of mind in enduring austerities. 
The core principle is not limited to avoiding food but controlling our senses.
Another important aspect to be remembered is that our ancestors have  always based practices on scientific principles. The atmospheric pressure on  Ekadashi, the eleventh day of the Lunar month is naturally low so fasting on those days helps in cleansing the digestive system. Modern eating habits tire our stomach and keeping a fast detoxifies our body and cleans it.
Legend says that demons exist in the rice particles eaten by human beings on Ekadashi day and turn into worms in their stomach. This actually must have had a scientific reason as mentioned earlier so eating light or fasting on Ekadashi days helps our digestive system. And eating early on the next day, Dwadashi helps us equally.
The fortnightly Ekadashi fasting accompanied with healthy eating improves our insulin responsiveness, lowers blood cholesterol and may therefore prolong our life span. Apart from cleansing our blood and improving the functioning of kidneys and liver it also helps us to become strong mentally.
Spiritually also Ekadashi is uplifting as we spend time in prayers and meditation. Reading the Bhagwat Gita is highly recommended since it contains the philosophy for our peaceful coexistence in society. 
And of course vsiting a temple of Lord Vishnu where normally a special entrance called Vaikunta Dwara is erected on this day. Passing through this Dwara, door.or  passage on this auspicious day leads us to Vaikuntam, heaven.
For Mumbaikars a visit to the Ahobila Mutt temple, Chembur and live telecast on Doordarshan Podhigai Channel with inspirational discourse by our revered Guru, Shri. U.Ve. AnanthaPadmanabhaChariar, fondly known as APN Swamy is a must. This is followed by the Darshan of the Lord with Teertham, Holy water, which contains Cardamom,' 'Karpura'' ( edible camphor), ''Tulsi'' (Holy Basil), Clove, etc as an energised purifier and Shadaari, the representation of Vishnu’s feet in gold placed on your head after praying to the Lord, so that you may attain Salvation.
This year however sanitizer replaced the divine Teertham and thermal tester took place of the Shadaari. The doors of the temple did not open at anointed time early morning though we were blessed to receive Darshan later in the day 
My heart felt a bit heavy as we took Darshan of the Gods and the Goddess. Yet the aura and the energies emanating from the temple filled me with a ray of hope to keep open doors of positive thoughts. As if God and Lord Krishna was saying that when troubles cloud your way, don't give up, light  like the golden dawn will soon your path adorn, so don't look forlorn and dont give up....

सूर्यास्त और सूर्योदय

सूर्यास्त और सूर्योदय

कभी यूँही अकेले सी शाम में
डूबता सूरज
डूबता दिल
सांझ की लालीमा में
रंजित  मन
रंजित मर्म
तूफ़ानी ह्रदय की लहरों में
व्यथित भाव
व्यथित मानस
अविचारी ख्यालों में
कुंठित बुद्धि
कुंठित कथन
अचानक दिल के कोने से
उठती चिंगारी
तेजस्वी प्रकाश
उज्वल मन
प्रफुल्लित सोच
विवेकपूर्ण समझ
फिर आएगा कल
फिर निकलेगा सूरज
बस रखो तुम धैर्य
रखो तुम धीरज

मन विमल

From 'bitter' to 'better' without comparison....

From 'bitter' to 'better' without comparison....

Social media may have made the world a small place but there is a danger of it shrinking our hearts. We are all caught up on looking good and feeling good on facebook, instagram, twitter.
Day in and out we see stories of success, adept cooking, perfect management of homes and wonderful relationships. There seems to be no room for imperfection. In fact sharing of negative thoughts appears to be  a challenge. Hardly any one shares their worries or anxieties. This maybe due to the fear of being seen as misfits.
Honestly many people may definitely feel inadequate on seeing so much perfection and also having to cope with it. The sword of comparison constantly dangles over our heads on every step. We end up comparing ourselves, our children, our homes, our vehicles, our mobile phones, in fact every single thing with others. This despite knowing the fact that each one of us is different.
A rose can never be a sunflower and the sunflower can never be a rose. Each of them is unique and has their own good qualities. It is in us to bloom just like the flowers which never think of competing with each other.
I confess, there have been times when I have been caught unawares in the web of comparisons but as years rolled by,  experience has taught me that whatever happens, happens  for our good.
I have learnt and I believe that I am person by myself and cannot be compared to others. The life which I lead, the things which I do are related to myself and cannot be compared to others.
Martha Green, a very renowned ballet dancer from the United States of  America has said that, "There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it."
She clearly meant that each one of us is unique and cannot be compared to another. Unfortunately we end up doing just that most of the times not realizing that it can be the sole cause of our worries.
Martha also said that it not your business to determine how good you are nor how valuable nor how you compare with other expressions. Your business is to keep yourself and your channels open clearly and directly. It was not even important to believe in yourself or your work. All you have to do is to keep yourself open and
aware to the urges that motivate you.
No artist is pleased or ever satisfied with himself or herself. It is this queerly divine dissatisfaction and the blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.
You can be driven only by your own passion. What people in the world think of you is really none of your business. And so it is important to steer clear of comparisons and do the tasks assigned to you in the best way possible.
Simply put forth it is very much based on the philosophy of the 'nishkam karm' in the Bhagwat Gita goading us into action without any expectations. Our only concern is to do the work without comparing ourselves to others. Comparison with one's self brings improvement and comparison with others leads to discontent.  So don't become bitter by comparing yourself with others just become better by competing with yourself.  

Relationship : Invisible intruders....

Relationship : Invisible intruders....

Remember the time when you struck a new friendship, fell in love, got married or became partners in sports or elsewhere? Everything was very pleasant, full of hope, each one wanting to give his or her own best. Each vibe was positive with an earnest desire to make the relationship work. Things continued to remain delectable till the day invisible intruders struck.
Honestly, any relationship is a bond , a connection among two people either as a friend,  family member, professional or business partner.  No doubts it springs among individuals but it also extends to larger groups as family, society. communities, nations and countries. 
The basic premise for the emergence of any relationship is the sense of belonging.
Human beings are social in nature and forming relationships is our basic need.This comes through family ties, friendships in school, at the work place, in sporting communities or religious organizations. 
Relationships are reassuring as they comfort us and show that we are not alone. Of course, all relationships depend on give and take between two individuals. They give us strength and make us happy. In fact being in a relationship can be very rewarding emotionally,  mentally, materially and physically.  Our state of mind and our health normally blossoms when our relationships are positive.
Strangely,  at times the very base of our relationship gets corroded due to invisible intruders. These could be words, gestures, actions, thoughts, feelings generating in our own minds or inflicted by others.
A healthy relationship begins with  attractions, similarities or complementary attitudes but with the entry of invisible intruders everything gets thrown out of the window. Insecurity seeps in and what was once certain becomes dubious. Things which were once perfect become blemished. The desire to be connected all the time gets diluted and a relationship which was too good to be true seems flawed suddenly.
One of the biggest challenges in any relationship is to sustain it with ease. Often, we need someone who loves us, makes us feel good, does things which nobody else would do. In short we need someone who keeps on giving while we are happy to be the one who receives.
In reality, a healthy relationship is one in which there is give and take between two individuals. Trust and mutual respect are its foundation but the actions which are questionable lead it to uncertainty.
We also overlook the fact that our relationship is based on our own feelings therefore the opinions of other people should neither matter nor mar those feelings.  Yet our thoughts get coloured by the thoughts and feelings of others. At times, insecurity and jealousies seep in and we become oblivious  to our initial feelings for each other.
Every relationship has it's high and low.  A responsive beautiful, functional, loving relationship can lift our moods and expand our horizons. A dysfunctional relationship can nearly destroy us and our peace. We must therefore be mindful of our behaviour so that there would be fewer broken hearts and souls.
So what are the ingredients of a healthy relationships? 
Clear communication, listening with attention, dropping assumptions, expressing our feelings without blame, respecting other people and their feelings, being truthful,  not letting past hurt influence present connections.
Trusting each other, being reliable and accountable with a  willingness to put in efforts to make the relation thrive. Focusing on each others strengths, as well as being aware of the need for improvement.
Managing a relationship is akin to driving a car or flying an aircraft. We  may feel we have mastered driving or flying yet we  have to mind our tracks lest we bump into others wrongly. We also have to keep track of the distance travelled so that we navigate ahead with precision, learning from our past experiences.
Life after all is not a destination but a journey with different sojourns and each step may bring forth a new situation. So look at the signals and the warnings, listen to what others say and be certain that your life is devoid of invisible intruders. Just keep in mind you are the driver or pilot and nobody else can manoeuvre your journey....

Sumedha : Of being wise and prudent

Sumedha : Of being wise and prudent

The year 2017, we had assembled for our first session of induction training in IAS at the Lal Bahadur Shastri National Academy of Administration at Mussourie. The mood was upbeat for we had all become a part of the coveted civil services. Each one was raring to go. The biggest advantage of getting inducted into IAS from state civil services is the sea of experience each one  has. We all shared our thoughts about our journey as administrators and the work we were doing.
Amongst all of them was Sumedha Kataria, from Haryana who had joined
Haryana State Civil Services as a Block Development and Panchayat Officer in 1990s. Her experience sharing and the ignominy about being a woman in a man's world stood out and has remained in my mind 
Our limited interactions at LBSNAA blossomed into mutual admiration during our foreign training at Seoul, South Korea. It was there that I discovered her multi-faceted personality as an orator, writer, poet, a connoisseur of arts, a rustic singer.
My evenings became aesthetic as I was transported to a literary world of books, music and gazhals.
She had a way with words which kept me engrossed. No doubts she was wise and intelligent. Her parents had probably guaged these qualities in her when they named her Sumedha.
The sixth among seven sisters she had  done her parents proud in school and college. A triple post graduate, she began her career as a lecturer in a college at Hissar. She was the first lady Block Development and Panchayat Officer and later joined the Haryana State Civil Services in 1992.
Verily Kurukshetra, the land of Bhagwat Gita has been her karmabhoomi as she worked there on different positions. As the Additional District Commissioner she was at the forefront of Swach Bharat Abhhiyan educating people that, " Khule me Shauch" was blasphemy. No wonder Kurukshetra had received the Nirmal Gram Puraskar during her tenure.
Shaping the Kurukshetra Development Board and giving a face to Gita Mahotsav and making it global has been her biggest contribution. I have seen her energy and enthusiasm at the International Gita Mahotsav in 2018 when she was posted as District Magistrate at Kurukshetra. 
Later as District Magistrate at Panipat she was instrumental in transforming the city and making it people centric. Her sensitivity to all causes and her accessibility to every citizen made her popular.
Raahgiri, a programme for community health scaled great heights thanks to her involvement and enthusiasm. The Pinkathon organised by her on International Women's Day in March 2019 broke world records.
As the Municipal Commissioner of Panchkula Municipal Corporation she created a system for safe disposal of medical waste during covid.
She proved her mettle when she was   posted as the Chief Administrator of Haryana State Agriculture Marketing Board, generally considered to be a male  fiefdom.
Her illustrious career of over  38 years speaks a lot about her commitment and professionalism..
What makes her different is her sensitivity,  understanding, maturity and modesty,  energy and enthusiasm, combined with dynamism, humility and ability which justifies her name in every sense of the word. It was her sixtieth birthday yesterday and I was amazed to see the number of people who came to wish her personally or through messages.
This was mainly because Sumedha is a persona, an individual par excellence. Her recognition as a bureaucrat is distinct not due to the positions she held but only due to the difference she made in those positions due to her own individuality.
In her exists a mentor, guide, friend, philosopher. I owe my creativity to her encouragement as Mann Vimal and Mann Rachnaayein were born thanks to her constant persuasion
Society needs such selfless people  and retirement from government service would open new vistas for her to guide the youth and women. In a world where the poor and downtrodden need a guiding force who is accessible there is no dearth of activities for Sumedhaji.
Happy 60th Birthday Sumedhaji... Wishing you great success as you embark on a new journey to spread light in the world....

Dealing with disappointments : Finite dissapointments to Infinite hope

Dealing with disappointments : Finite dissapointments to Infinite hope

Life has many ups and downs. Most would easily agree with me. This maybe due to the various experiences we have in our lives or also due to the strength of our  upbringing.
For me too, things were never hunky dory and I have had my share of struggles.  Being straightforward,  cut and right , has led to many problems. Often I have invited  troubles by putting my foot in my mouth. Yet every time I have bounced back slowly but surely. 
Each one of us has our own share of dissapointments, failures, troubles and struggles but that does not mean that good days are never going to come back. Life is a cycle and what goes up must come down. So neither good days nor bad days can last forever.
What one has to learn is to find balance between the repeated swinging of the pendulum of life from one end to another. Often it is our  family, friends, colleagues and peers who help us do it but in reality it is one's own self which helps us tide over crises. 
I have been blessed to have a family which has supported me in every leg of my journey.  My friends have been my comfort,  my colleagues and staff my support system. Together with them the journey of my life has become joyful.  And it is not that there have been no adversaries or opponents but I have learnt to co-exist with them. So ultimately it is all about balance and self control. 
We must know that people,  places and things may hurt or dissapoint us. These may include those whom we love the most,  our family, friends and colleagues. The hurt may not be intentional or people  may behave in a particular manner due to the situations they are placed in but  their words or actions do affect us positively and at times adversely.
If we think back later , we may realise that it was our perception and not their words which caused us anguish. 
It is natural for all human beings  to get  hurt by the words and acts of others at some point in their life. However our minds can help us overcome our dissapointments.
We have to learn to protect and steel ourselves so that others are unable to rattle our nerves. Doing this is not very difficult specially if one takes steps like simply experiencing the feeling and getting over it. Time is the best healer and things smoothen out or fade out with time. We could also learn a lot from children who usually move on without holding grudges in their hearts.
It is important to experience the feeling and get over it rather than let it spoil your present and the future. Time gives us room to accommodate our thoughts as well as those of others. It therefore makes things easier creating a win win situation for everybody.  We must love ourselves like a friend who let's us bounce back to normal.
Of course our core values must centre around positivity so that it becomes easier to overcome bitter situations. 
Some people see me as short-tempered, stern, adamant or resolute but I have observed that most people come around when they ultimately see my view point. Of course a few would  never see my view point nor agree with me but I believe that it is not possible to make everyone happy. Apart from diasgreeing some may even dislike you yet it is important to harbor positive feelings of love and kindness towards others and avoid negativity. Whenever I am disappointed I bounce back only due to these core values. 
I strongly believe in the goodness of every human being and feel that circumstances make them behave differently in different situations. 
I am an eternal believer in the fact that this too shall pass and good times will return eventually. 
This has always helped me to overcome my disappointments and worries. Of course accepting the good with the bad, the dissapointments with the success has also helped. 
Another important point which I always bear in mind is that I may be disappointed or fail but I am not a failure or a non-performer. I feel sure that in my own way i make a difference in society.  My presence adds value to it. I have to learn from my mistakes and those of others and move on.
Agreed that I times I may have wallowed in pain and self-pity but ultimately I learnt to do things differently and in the best way possible for me each time.
Setbacks are a part of life but one has to stay strong,  learn and improve by handling them.
Being grateful for all the creature comforts in my life has also helped me to overcome my disappointments.
Keeping the channels of communication open and sharing with others also helps me to vent out my thoughts and feelings.  In fact I consider this my strongest quality because my openness in sharing  unburdens me from the pressure of pretence.
And neither do I expect everyone to be perfect. The most important thing I always ask myself is would this matter to me five years from now?  That has helped me a lot in moving ahead.
And if you are so stressed just take break , nothing in life is worth losing your sleep over it. Helping others and being regular in exercise also gives us support . Reading and writing or doing any activity which is creative is a great diversion.
At all times it is important to maintain your self-esteem and keep your spirits high to enable growth.
Disappointment is therefore not a mountain which cannot be scaled. In fact it is learning to climb up the hill slowly and surely one step at a time without being bitter.
Life is a beautiful gift given by God and we have to live it fully under all circumstances. For me, thinking of suicide is insanity, an act of cowardice and ungratefulness to God who has given us this opportunity to make a difference in this world. None of us know whether we will live for minutes, days or months. However what is in our hands is to make every single second in our life beautiful and fruitful. So while disappointment maybe inevitable learning to face it is a choice available to each one of us. Or as rightly said by Martin Luther King, Jr., "We must accept finite disappointment but we must never lose infinite hope."

तुम चले गए....

तुम चले गए....

तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
ख़त्म हो जाएंगे सारे प्रश्न
तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
मिल जाएंगे सारे जवाब
तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
सुलझ जाएंगी सारी उलझनें
तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
कोई तुम्हें नहीं समझेगा जनाब
तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
तुम हो अकेले, बेबस, लाचार
तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
दुश्मनी कौन लेगा साहब
तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
नाकाबिल हो तुम, अक्षम....
तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
कैसे साबित होगा अच्छा बुरा
तुम चले गए
शायद यह सोचकर
तूफ़ान है भयंकर नहीं थमेगा आज
तुम चले गए....
ना रुके, ना सोचा...
पर क्या वक्त रुका?
तुम चले गए
क्या साबित हुुआ?
तुम चले गए....
चला गया,बेजोड़ व्यक्तिमत्व
तुम चले गए
टूटे हज़ारों के सपने और विश्वास
तुम चले गए
गिरा अपनों पर पहाड़
चहकते मुस्कुराते तुम
औरों को धीर देनेवाले...
ना समझ पाए, 
बादल गरजकर बरसते
या बरसकर निकल जाते
पर आसमान रेहता वहीं
फिर उदार होने के लिए
बदलते मौसमों के साथ
फुहारने फिर बहार...
सच...
मौसमों का आना जाना कब रुका...
पर बहुत कुछ रुक गया
तुम्हारे जाने के बाद....

मन विमल